Stop the Drama: Resolving Conflicts in Your Membership Organisation

Effective dispute resolution is crucial for successful association management, particularly when dealing with committee disputes or internal club conflicts. This guide provides a step-by-step approach to conflict mediation, emphasising the need to listen to all parties and find common ground. It highlights the importance of a clear code of conduct in your terms and conditions to proactively prevent conflicts and ensure open member communication for a healthier organisation.

When I mentioned to the Member Jungle team that I was writing an article on how to resolve disputes in clubs and associations, there was a sudden outpouring of stories about conflicts that had happened at their own clubs and at those of our customers. Stories about peak bodies having to mediate for clubs, hostile takeovers, club presidents thrown out, military coups, okay, maybe not that last one; but it’s fair to say that things can get pretty wild when club members and admins have disagreements. 

If you're the one tasked with resolving these conflicts, it can be an extremely uncomfortable and awkward situation. It's a careful balancing act; if you get it wrong, you’re going to get accused of being biased, being on someone’s side since the start, next thing you know, someone’s yelling, “you’ve always hated me,” and you’ve lost all power in the mediation as one side now sees you as prejudiced.
 

 

Why You Need To Step In When There’s Conflict

I actually have my own story about this. At a previous job, I worked in a department with three other people. For whatever reason, two of the guys decided that the other was leaving too much work for them to do. So they both deliberately started leaving more work for one another, under the logic, "He should have done that anyway; I'm not doing his work for him." For a while, this hostility was just awkward, and I was able to look the other way. I got along with both of them and didn't want to make things awkward between us.

However, this was a mistake, as they continued to leave more and more work. Eventually, the workload became so unbalanced that the other person and I were responsible for nearly everything, while the two fighting contributed very little. Our boss knew about what was happening and had gently attempted to sort out the problem, but nothing came of it, as he was probably trying to avoid a larger conflict.

Eventually, it came to a head when, at the end of my rope, I marched into the boss’s office and very calmly informed him that if he didn’t sort the boys out, I would be promptly murdering both of them. I’m quite reserved in person, and needless to say, my boss found this threat of murder quite surprising. He did, however, fix the problem.

 

 

Because we let this conflict fester for so long before stepping in, there were some really strong feelings and dug-in stances that cost the department a lot of efficiency and slowed down our work. Ultimately, it played a part in both people having issues losing their jobs within a few months. My point is that several people decided to step back and hope the conflict would sort itself out. It ended up hurting the team, slowing down work, and creating a toxic atmosphere that ultimately led to good people leaving.

It can be easy to ignore a conflict within your organisation, especially if the people involved are your friends. It’s tempting to throw your hands up and disengage; after all, conflict is messy, and no one wants to jeopardise friendships. However, if committee members are at odds, it’s really important to step in and address the problem as soon as possible. If left unchecked, conflicts can escalate and lead to larger issues like breakdowns in communication and important tasks being missed.

Therefore, when a conflict arises in your club or association, it’s important to intervene sooner rather than later to prevent the situation from worsening.

A Step-by-Step Approach To Mediating Disputes

Okay, let’s go over the steps to properly and successfully mediate any disputes that you might face in your organisation. 

Step 1: Listen To All Sides

The first step when a conflict arises is to get a proper understanding of who is involved and what the disagreement is about. So, you need to have separate sit-downs with all the parties involved to find out exactly what is going on. 

I would recommend that you do the following things for these meetings: 

• Meet in person whenever possible
• Be calm and friendly. You are not here to point fingers, blame, or address the other party's concerns; you are just listening to their side of the story.
• Remain neutral 
• Record audio and/or video of the meeting for later reference 
• Have a third person there as well
• Make detailed notes afterwards

The idea behind recording the meetings, taking notes and having another person there is all for backup in case this situation gets messy down the line. You want to have proof that you handled every step of the mediation professionally and unbiasedly. 

Once you have met with all the parties having issues, and taken notes and recordings, you can move on to step two. 

Step 2: Identify Common Ground and Disagreements

Now that you have a clear grasp of each person's perspective, it's time to review your notes and recordings. The aim here is to spot two main things: where everyone agrees and where they disagree.

You should aim to pinpoint the core conflict. The initial disagreement might be a symptom of a deeper issue. By carefully reviewing the details, you can identify the root cause of the problem. Is it a misunderstanding? A difference in opinion on how things should be run? A clash of personalities?

You should then look for shared goals or values. Did all parties express a desire for the club to succeed? Do they all care about the same core mission? Highlighting these shared values can be a powerful tool for bringing people together.

Once you have a clear picture of both the common ground and the core disagreements, you can move on to step three.

Step 3: Develop Solutions Together

This is where the mediation truly begins. Bring all parties together in a neutral, calm setting and present the areas of common ground you've identified. Use this as a foundation to work towards a solution they can all agree to. It’s far more effective to approach the discussion from a position of, “We all want the club to succeed, so let's find a solution we can all support,” rather than trying to determine whose initial idea was better. 

It’s not a bad idea to record this meeting too, so you have proper notes and transcripts for the whole process. 

Encourage everyone to contribute ideas for how to resolve the conflict. Remember, at this stage, there’s no such thing as a bad idea; the goal is to generate as many options as possible. For each potential solution, discuss the pros and cons. How would it affect the club? How would it impact each person involved?

The ultimate goal is to move forward, not to dwell on past grievances. Keep the conversation focused on creating a positive path for the club and its members rather than on the initial disagreement. 

If the parties cannot come to an agreement, the decision needs to be made without them. This is where a pre-established rule in your organisation's Terms and Conditions becomes crucial. It’s important to have a clear procedure that dictates how a decision is made when an agreement can't be reached, such as leaving the final decision to a vote or the president.

Step 4: Formalise the Agreement

Once you have reached a decision that everyone is happy with or at least a decision that the aggrieved parties hate equally, it's crucial to get it all in writing. This formalises the agreement and ensures everyone is on the same page going forward.

To do this, you should:

• Write down the agreed-upon solution in plain, easy-to-understand language.
• Outline what actions are needed and who is responsible for what, and by when.
• A signed agreement, whether physical or digital, signifies everyone's commitment to the resolution.
• Include notes and transcripts of individual meetings and mediation for the record. 

This document serves as a record of the resolution and can be referred to later to ensure that the agreement is being upheld by all parties. It will also serve as proof that you handled the disagreement professionally and fairly, in case anyone holds a grudge. 

Step 5: Follow Up and Review

Mediation doesn't end with a signed agreement. It's essential to follow up and ensure the solution is working, preventing the conflict from re-emerging.

• Have a designated person check in with the parties to see how things are progressing.
• After a set period, ask for feedback on the resolution process. What worked? What could be improved?
• If the solution isn't working as planned, be prepared to go back to the drawing board and make adjustments.
• If you know two people on your committee who don't get along, it may be a good idea to minimise how much they have to work together while they are both still on the committee. While not an ideal long-term solution, it can help prevent future conflicts from arising.

By following these steps, you can turn a difficult situation into an opportunity for growth and strengthen your club's community.

Preventing Disputes In Your Organisation Is Better Than Solving Them

It won’t come as a surprise to anyone, but avoiding conflicts in the first place is much better than having to fix them. It’s why the first lesson of any good self-defence class is ‘run away’ and why seating arrangements at weddings are such a headache. You know, sitting your friend who is obsessed with astrology at the same table as your friend who is an astronomer, will end with the astronomer using a telescope as a bludgeon.  

 

While knowing how to mediate disputes is very important, it’s even better if you can prevent them from arising to begin with. One of the best ways to do this is to foster a culture of open communication. Most disagreements start as small frustrations that go unspoken. Regular, informal check-ins, whether over coffee, in a private group chat, or during a committee meeting, give people a safe space to raise concerns early. When members feel heard, tensions are less likely to build into a full-blown conflict.

Having official terms and conditions and a code of conduct at your organisation can be a massive help, too. These documents set expectations from day one, making it easier to enforce boundaries and prevent misunderstandings. Having rules in place for how disagreements should be handled and when an intervention is necessary reduces the chance of things going wrong in the first place and gives you a guide on how to intervene. Most importantly, it gives you a social "out." You aren't being nosy or risking friendships; you're simply obligated to step in and mediate according to the organisation's rules. This can be a game-changer, turning a potentially awkward situation into a manageable process. It’s certainly something I wish I had in the story I mentioned earlier. 

Any changes to your organisation's constitution or governing rules will likely need to be approved at your Annual General Meeting or a specialised meeting. After the vote, and new conflict resolution rules have been passed, transparency is crucial; ensure that all members, staff, and committee members are fully informed of the new rules. To promote consistency, it is a really good idea to include a dedicated, step-by-step conflict resolution policy in your governing documents. This will provide everyone with a clear and defined process to follow.

Finally, define roles and responsibilities clearly. Many disputes stem from confusion over who’s supposed to do what. When committee roles are vague or overlapping, tasks get missed, people feel like their boundaries have been crossed, and resentment brews. A clear breakdown of what everyone’s roles are and what the lines are between them can go a long way. We will talk more about this in the next section. 

Ultimately, preventing conflict isn’t about being perfect; it’s about being proactive. With clear rules, open dialogue, and well-defined roles, your organisation can stay focused on what it does best.

How Technology Like Member Jungle Can Help

While the core of dispute resolution is human, technology can be a powerful ally in preventing and managing conflicts. The Member Jungle platform, for example, offers several features that can help.

• Set Permissions: At Member Jungle, you can assign different permissions to various committee members, ensuring that only the individuals you designate can view, add, or edit specific data and sections of the website. This clearly defines and enforces who is authorised to make changes. For instance, only your membership officer can edit member data, and only your events manager can create events.
   
• Keep a Digital Record: Member Jungle also provides the capability to track who makes changes in your system. If an unauthorised change is made to a piece of information, you can quickly identify who made it. This feature simplifies the process of determining accountability, eliminating the confusion of disputes over "he said, she said."

 

Besides using the Member Jungle system, other tools like AI note-taking software can be super helpful for keeping track of your meetings and mediation sessions. These tools can automatically record and summarise what was said, giving you an unbiased rundown of the conversation. If you want to learn more, check out our article, The 3 Best AI Tools to Take Meeting Minutes.

By leveraging technology in these ways, you can create a more transparent, organised, and accountable environment that helps prevent disputes from ever taking root.

How You Can Prevent More Disputes Going Forward 

To see how you can use Member Jungle to assign different permission levels to your committee members, check out Don't Let Your Committee Get Lost in the Jungle: A Guide To Member Jungle Committee Access.

To find out more about how to create great terms and conditions for your membership organisation, read Legal Essentials: Your Guide to Club Privacy Policies and T&Cs.